Today’s blog post is going to be a little bit different. I don’t normally sit down and chat like this anywhere. But I’ve always valued honesty, and try to be as honest as I can myself. So this is going to be a “wear my heart on my sleeve,” and potentially short, sweet and simple blog post for this February morning.
I haven’t written anything for so long I don’t know what to do.
I still love learning. I love dissecting grammar, improving my own, reading about history and touring Pennsylvania and all that jazz. I still love reading, finding new authors with writing styles I love, and finding new-to-me books I’ve never even heard of.
But I’ve been out of the habit of writing for so long that I don’t know if I should try and revive an old project, try doing short stories for a little while, or just say goodbye to writing in general.
For 8 years I’ve maintained this website. It’s undergone several rebrandings from Another Hartman Author to Chocolate & Paper to The Pittsburgh Writer. I really hate to admit this, but I really think that I’ve lost my passion for writing and don’t know how to find it again.
As a child I loved writing. I excelled at it when I was in grade school but hated when it needed to be graded. Can’t use that excuse nowadays, especially when it seems like everyone else is trying to reach the same goal I am. So that’s been really disheartening. I wouldn’t say it’s jealousy, because that’s an evil eyed monster nobody wants to admit to having. I try my best to connect with others, but it seems like all anybody wants to from potential authors is a large social media following and that’s just not for me.
I’ve tried cutting myself off completely from social media in an attempt to make myself write again, but I’m too easily distracted. So I appear back on social media again and again. I’m sure that’s why the algorithms never favor me no matter what I try. I know I need something to do in my spare time, and I thought writing was it.
But now I’m on the fence about writing as a whole. To continue or not to continue? Yes, I paraphrased Shakespeare there. The writing environment has changed so so much from when I was a child. I used to dream about going the traditional publishing route but even that’s now changed as well. I also work so much now that the words just don’t flow as easily as they used to when I sit down to even attempt a writing sesh.
As of the 5th of February, 2023, I find myself at a crossroad: do I continue on with writing, or do I hang up my creativity for the foreseeable future? I just don’t know…
…an thoughts would be appreciated on this February Sunday.
Sounds like you’re really busy with work and exhausted from your new schedule. No wonder you don’t feel creative!
I think writing a good story is still the most important thing.
At first I thought that was it, but now I’m not so sure. Even in my off hours I’d rather do everything away from a computer, except I am doing more blogging than I have any other year. So I dunno…
I’m sorry you are struggling so much with this. I understand your dilemma.
It would be a shame if you gave up writing. A creative outlet is important and it’s something you’re good at, but more importantly, enjoy (or used to).
Perhaps the pressures of what to do with your writing (publishing routes, etc) is acting a bit like grading your writing and putting you off.
I’d suggest you try to write something just for fun to rekindle your creative spark. Don’t worry about what it is (story, poem, fragment, description) or what will happen to it. Just write, get the juices flowing, and see where it leads you.
I’m very happy to do writing sprints a couple of times a week if that would help.
Yeah, I thought the same thing. There just seems to be so much expected of writers these days that it’s a little ridiculous. Why can’t it just be about writing a good story without worrying about needing to have a following?
I’ve also just been TIRED from work lately. I’m now in healthcare and am just finishing up a 60 hour stint. So by the time I get home I don’t even want to read. Just eat, sleep, work, repeat. So maybe it’s also that I’m still trying to figure out my work/life balance with this new job? I dunno…